Fireworks

 “Penny for the guy?”

Echoes from every street corner;

Where kids hope to make enough change

For a dodgy roll up from their brother.

The chill air carries the faint smell

Of stewing meat and molten sugar.

Boys jeer and drink cheap cider,

As the girls giggle around a cone of cold chips.

This years local celebrity plays host

Over the outdated sound system-

The din drowned out by police sirens,

Not on our estate for a change.

When the first rocket soars the atmosphere is changed,

The children stand in awe,

The once beautiful mums cracking a smile

At the cheesy ballad from their prime.

For once the air really is filled with the sound of fireworks,

Even the lads and dads fall silent.

The smoky air not caused from fags

And no lingering funny musk scent left behind.

It’s not necessarily the setting; Hollywood is miles away.

But when you live in a city of sin, you can’t help thinking-

If God created the stars,

This is the closest we will ever get to Heaven.

Love Yourself

I spent a very large part of my life hating myself- in fact to this day, I still have days where I can’t stand to look in the mirror. It’s not even solely about my appearance, to an extent that would be easier to deal with; it’s also about me as a person; I have always found myself annoying, vain, selfish and simply an unlikeable/ undesirable person.

However one of my main goals to accomplish while I’m seventeen is to learn to love myself- considerably the most important lesson a girl needs to learn before she grows up. I am aware that there is still a far way to go before I truly reach self- assurance, however I have noticed a massive change in myself due to the changes I’ve made and hope maybe they will help you to begin this same journey. So here we go...

1.      1)  Eat right- and by this I don’t mean live on kale and cook everything in coconut oil, although both of those things are a part of it. Take care of yourself and eat healthily and sensibly, don’t eat right before going to bed and choose a salad over pasta every now and then. But then also let yourself eat a bowl of ice-cream with the X-Factor or eat a pizza at a sleepover. The key is to neither restrict or over indulge; you don’t have to deny yourself what you enjoy, because that’s just as bad as eating it all the time. Just listen to what your body needs and then on the occasions it wants a treat, let it have one- just don’t take the treat too far.

2.       2) Exercise- you don’t have to run a marathon but just choosing to walk to school once or twice a week will ultimately make you feel better. The exercise will release endorphins which are the happy chemicals- just look at Mo Farah, he’s always smiling.

3.      3) Date yourself. This may sound sad at first but dating myself is the best idea I’ve ever had. You don’t necessarily have to take yourself on a candlelit dinner to achieve this; just have lunch alone every once in a while or take half an hour a day to really think and get to know yourself without any distractions. I especially like to go shopping alone and then grab lunch at a coffee shop- there’s something therapeutic about reading a book to the smell of freshly ground coffee.

4.     4) Give yourself credit. This is one I’m still trying to master but so far I have learned that there is a massive difference between humility and self-depreciation however it is a line easily crossed. Be proud of your accomplishments and relish in the praise, just give credit where it’s due.

5.      5) Treat yourself. Slightly different to food but in the same vein. One of my best investments is pretty underwear- it just makes me feel good about myself even though no-one can see it. Whether your thing is makeup, clothes or even something completely unrelated- just find something that makes you feel confident and invest in it.

6.      6) Be honest with yourself. If that means admitting your favourite jeans are too small now or that you could have tried harder on the test- being honest with yourself just allows you to create goals for you to achieve that will be rewarded with a feeling of pride and general happiness.

7.     

            7) Surround yourself with good people. Remove negative energy and surround yourself with love and eventually the love they have for you will catch on to you. Friends and family are a priceless resource that will change your whole perspective, choose wisely and they will cause you to forget all of your unhealthy inhibitions and insecurities.

8.      8) Capture the good memories. Whether you keep a diary, take endless photos or make a playlist for every occasion, just find something that allows you to revisit the happier times on your bad days.

9.      

       9) Find a hobby- having something productive to occupy your time when you feel like shit will always help to pull you out of a bad mood. How can you feel insignificant, talentless or worthless  when you just crocheted an Eeyore?

And finally, the most important lesson of all- embrace the bad days. You’re stuck with them so use them to your advantage; find what makes you feel bad and fix the problem, whether that means changing your lifestyle, job or bad relationship and if the bad feelings don’t change, use them to your advantage until they do, some of the world’s greatest creations were born from the worst of experiences.

I am a 'Lazy Perfectionist'

As seems to be tradition within my blog, I’m going to apologise for my infrequent posting. However this time instead of making some form of promise to post more or give some half- hearted excuse, I am going to give you the truth- and if there is only one promise I make on this blog for the rest of its existence it is this; I will always be bluntly honest here, this is one of the few places where I am unashamed to be unapologetically and entirely myself.

As the title of this post may suggest- I have given myself the title of a ‘Lazy Perfectionist’. This title is coined from a conversation I had with an old councillor when he tried to explain to 12 year old me some of the things going on in my brain (more of which I may delve deeper into as I adjust to this blunt honesty shit I’m pulling here and feel more comfortable admitting it not only to people I do and don’t know, but to myself) in the simplest of terms. We were having a conversation after I had gotten a detention for not doing my homework- which he later got me out of- when he explained to me a common trait of people in the same boat as me was procrastination. He explained that they have a need for everything they do to be perfect, however do not have the self belief or motivation to make it so and find it easier to not try at all so that it can be played off as lack of interest instead of lack of capability. He then chuckled at my amazed little face as this revelation took root in me and made the load on my shoulders feel a little lighter, and then simply said “You’re just a lazy perfectionist.” And since then, I have carried the term with me- seeking comfort in not only the fact that I am not alone in this habit but also that I now have a name for an issue I struggled with blindly for years. This term meant I now knew what I was up against and could work out a way to beat it.

However despite this term having given me the new found resolve to fight my own habit and force myself to work despite my obsession with perfection and lack of faith- I still sometimes struggle. Since my last post I have written a dozen things I could have used in this period of radio silence, but with my hectic schedule I didn’t feel like I had the time or energy to edit them to my own standards- my internal perfectionist couldn’t cope with the idea of me putting something into the world that wasn’t good enough. Sometimes I still myself to put on the “I don’t give a shit” facade when in actual fact I’m afraid of looking like a fool when I do try but still fail- just look at my attempt at AS biology or my half filled sketchbooks (only one of which I plan on making an effort to amend- the new pack of pencils may give a hint to which one I’m talking about).

This mindset is not only my reason for struggling to begin something, it is also the reason why I often fail to finish them- the amount of times I’ve started new projects, or exploring new hobbies but not finished them because I don’t see them as good enough without knowing how to fix it or not seeing myself as good enough to justify spending time on carrying on (looking at the unused guitar strings and book of tabs I bought after my only lesson with Rosie). It’s not an excuse I know- it means I’m often unreliable and at times a complete mess when it comes to organisation and keeping on top of my life- if anything it is one of my worst qualities. But it’s the truth, a truth which my nearest and dearest have had to adapt to handling.

So- this evening I decided it was time to take a step, and I thought the easiest way to do that would be to post an un-edited update and begin working on some new posts- one of which will be uploaded by the end of the week, whether I see it as perfect or not. I have also realised that one of the easiest ways to quieten that little voice that niggles at me while I write to rest by leaving all of my posts unedited then getting a second opinion before reading it over again myself- thus taking away some of the pressure from myself.

Already I feel this plan working, just the act of writing has gotten the cogs turning and my mind overflowing with new ideas and plans for old ones. I am going to kick this habit’s ass but I’m going to need you to hang on with me while I do so, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.

Thank you for supporting me and my writing- 

Georgia xx   

Launching the Beauty Tab

So it’s Monday night and as is tradition, I am doing nothing but killing time on the internet and eating various questionable snacks, apples with peanut butter or croutons anyone? Whilst on my second apple I decided to try and make my evening somewhat productive and making note of some blogpost ideas which is when something occurred to me; despite creating this blog with the intention of writing about beauty, a subject which I love to talk about, and creating a whole tab on this blog dedicated to that very topic- I have never actually written a typically beauty related post.

So here I am, with little inspiration if I’m honest, however I felt that it would make sense for me to first introduce the beauty side of my blogging personality in a somewhat formal way, and what better way to do that than by doing a tag? So instead of doing the regular tag that has been done a 100 times over, I’ve compiled a series of questions from all different tags and added a couple of my own that will give you a general insight into what I’m like as a beauty blogger which I will answer as bluntly honest as I possibly can.

11)      Name a beauty regimen that you rarely do.

I guess that would have to be skincare, I’m ashamed to admit I don’t have a real routine for this, I just cleanse with whatever I saw in Boots that month that would help whatever was going on with my annoyingly combination/ acne prone skin and my Simple moisturiser

22)      Do you wash your makeup brushes regularly?

I wish I could say yes with confidence but really that is a matter of opinion. I give my brushes a quick clean every week or so and I’m now getting into the habit of cleaning them properly at least once a month if not every two weeks- baby steps.

33)      How long does it take you to put on your makeup?

This is completely dependent on the situation. On a regular day it usually takes somewhere between 15 minutes to an hour, depending on whether I have overslept or whether I have the motivation to try. If I’m going out for a night out It can take anywhere between one to two hours.

44)      Will you leave the house without wearing makeup?

Absolutely not- I have so much respect for women who can go about their day barefaced, but personally it is completely out of the question. I’m really insecure and makeup is like my armour- it gives me strength and just makes me feel more positive- you can tell how I feel about the way I look just by what my mood is like, chances are if I’m being grumpy it’s because I’m having a ‘bad makeup day’ or ‘bad body image day’.

55)      How many high end products do you have?

I am fortunate enough to have a reasonably sized collection of high end products considering the wages I get from my part time job. At the moment my favourites are my new MAC lipstick which is the Viva Glam II or my Urban Decay NYC palette.

66)      Name the 5 makeup products you couldn’t live without.

My Rimmel ‘Wake Me Up’ concealer in ‘Light’, my Rimmel ’25 hour lasting finish’ foundation in ‘Ivory’, my MAC eyebrow pencil in ‘Lingering’, my Rimmel ‘Scandaleyes’ eyeliner and my all go to nudey-pink lipstick- Revlon Colourburst in ‘Elusive’.

77)      What time do you get up and go to sleep?

I go to sleep anywhere between 10.30PM and 5AM depending on how tired I am from the day’s activity however no matter what time I go to sleep it’s impossible for me to sleep in past 10AM. I have found that I work the best with between four and 5 hours sleep, even though it doesn’t help the bags under my eyes.

88)      Which beauty product gives you the most confidence?

Definitely concealer/foundation- I have a lot of blemishes, spots and redness on my skin a lot of the time in addition to my natural dark circles- so concealer and foundation give me a lot more confidence and hide my problem areas. 

99)      Describe your every day style.

This is difficult because my ‘style’ seems to be quite eclectic. I have some very grunge elements (like my collection of denim, flannel and Doc Martens), then some more classic pieces (think lots of monochrome and little black dresses), my more vintage pieces (50’s dresses will always have a place in my heart) and finally my more vintage/boho selection (lots of floral, lace and shirt dresses).

And finally...

110)   Your favourite beauty related activities.

I genuinely love shopping, whether it is online or actually within a store- I especially love Etsy and Depop for unusual/ unavailable pieces and I could spend days in Selfridges without ever getting bored. I also really enjoy doing my makeup- I will happily spend hours in the evening playing with my makeup, finding new techniques and creating new looks, and my makeup collection is my pride and joy.

So here is my way of introducing you to my more beauty focused area of my blog- of course I will continue with my more creative posts and my rambley, train of thought post as well- consider this my way of sharing another layer of my personality with you all. I can continue to post my creative work with my random bursts of feminism alongside the posts about my August favourites and top 10 cleansers.

I hope you will be interested enough to read my take on this widely blogged about subject.

Lots of Love,

Georgia xx

The One Where I Make A Come-Back

Hello Again!

I feel like first and foremost I owe you guys an apology. I seemingly left and forgot about you all without warning or reason- I promise that wasn't the actual reason for my disappearing act, but still I'm sorry.

Over the past few months I've had a lot going on which has meant that I have had no time to write- or create- anything and as the weeks drew on without any form of artistic release- my inspiration and motivation seemed to fade. First my mum got badly injured and so I had to take the role of a secondary carer to my brother as well as helping her and my dad in countless other tasks that she would normally be responsible for, I saw my favourite band on Earth play Wembley Arena, I returned to my job and have barely stopped working since, then came my exams (in case you guys didn't know I'm in my first year of college and just finished my AS exams) and all of the work I had to put into those and then to top it off aspects of my personal seemed to be constantly crumbling. All of these things just overwhelmed, leaving me with no motivation or inspiration to create. So once again, I'm sorry I left for so long- I never intended to be gone for as long as I was.

But now I'm back with my fire to create and nothing to drag me away again. Now that exams are over and my life is back to it usual organised mess I can go back to my passions, my outlets without having to worry about anything else. This blog is going to be changing and moving quick, so here is my little plan:

• I am aiming to upload 2-3 times a week , work and college depending, however I make no promises of when these uploads will be.

• I am going to be posting on all of my social media more frequently, they have appeared very barren as of late. 

• I am now going to be opening my Tumblr to you guys as well so you can stay up to date with all of the things I'm interested in.

• My SnapChat will also be available so you can see my obviously thrilling life as it happens.

• And finally my content here will be changing slightly- I am going to slowly bring in some more lifestyle/ beauty posts and just posts I am genuinely interested in to break up all of my creative writing, So every week there will now be one creative piece, one lifestyle piece and then the occasional pieces surrounding things that are interesting to me at the time.  

Thank you for sticking with me, but here's to the future. I hope you guys have been doing well in my absence and are excited for the re-birth of WholeLotOfHeart, 

With love, 

Georgia x

Twitter: GeorgiaIsAWhat

Tumblr: http://silver-screencliche.tumblr.com/

Instagram: GeorgiaJunePowell

Snapchat: georgiajune

Introducing Me

So considering this is my first blog post, I thought it would be best if I introduced myself, so here is my TMI tag in blog form so you can learn a little bit more about me before you actually listen to me write about my life and interests. So lets start with something easy before I answer the questions...

Hi I'm Georgia, I'm sixteen and here are my TMI answers:

1: What are you wearing? Black highwaisted skinny jeans from Topshop and a grey oversized jersey jumper with beaded detailing on it from H&M
2: Ever been in love? Maybe
3: Ever had a terrible breakup? No
4: How tall are you? 5"1 (yes I am a dot)
5: How much do you weigh? Lets skip that one
6: Any tattoos? None, but I can't wait to get some done
7: Any piercings? I have my ears pieced twice 
8: OTP? Literally too many to list
9: Favorite Show? Game of Thrones
10: Favorite bands? All Time Low, 5 Seconds of Summer, Pierce the Veil and My Chemical Romance
11: Something you miss? .Certain friends and relationships I used to have
12: Favorite song? At the minute it's either Me Without You by All Time Low or End Up Here by 5SOS
13: How old are you? I'm 16 and wont be 17 until June 3rd 
14: Zodiac sign? Gemini
15: Quality you look for in a partner? Someone who can make me laugh (and great cuddles) 
16: Favorite Quote? 'We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars'
17: Favorite actor? Helena Bonham Carter
18: Favorite color? Purple
19: Loud music or soft? LOUD!!
20: Where do you go when you're sad? In my head- Disneyland In real life- My room 
21: How long does it take you to shower? Depends-usually about 25 minutes...
22: How long does it take you to get ready in the morning? About an hour unless I'm showering
23: Ever been in a physical fight? Nope 
24: Turn on? A great smile and sense of humor 
25: Turn off? Arrogance and narcissism 
26: Fears? Basically anything but my biggest fear is probably talking in front of people I don't know
27: Last thing that made you cry? A video of a soldier surprising his daughter
28: Last time you said you loved someone? Probably earlier today or yesterday
29: Meaning behind your blog title? It's from the saying 'I'm just a girl with a whole lot of heart'
30: Last book you read? The Picture of Dorian Grey
31: The book you're currently reading? Game of Thrones
32: Last show you watched? Keeping up with the Kardashians
33: Last person you talked to? My friends
34: The relationship between you and the person you last texted? He's my dad  
35: Favorite food? I don't know actually...
36: Place you want to visit? I really want to go to Italy or do a road trip through America 
37: Last place you were? College
38: Do you have a crush? Nope 
39: Last time you kissed someone? Wouldn't you like to know
40: Last time you were insulted? Probably earlier today at some point
41: Favourite flavour of sweet? Lemon
42: What instruments do you play? I can't play any really, I can kind of play drums, piano and clarinet though 
43: Favourite piece of jewellery? Either my Links necklace or the ring my nana bought for me
44: Last sport you played? HAHAHA I don't do sport 
45: Last song you sang? Queen of Hearts by We The Kings 
46: Favourite chat up line?  'Hey baby I'd ask for your name but I'd muck rather hear your phone number' 
47:Have you ever used it? God no, it's awful!
48: Last time you hung out with anyone? Earlier today at college 

So there you go that a little bit about me that you probably wouldn't of known otherwise, I promise I'll post something a little more interesting soon! If you want to hear more from me between posts then you can find me on:

Twitter- @GeorgiaIsAWhat
Instagram- @georgiajunepowell
Tumblr-Silver-ScreenCliche
8Tracks-WholeLotOfHeart
Pinterest-WholeLotOfHeart

Thanks for reading, With Love Georgia